The Ultimates 1 Review

Hello again my friends and welcome to another installment of Avenger November! Today its time for the first review of two of the Marvel series The Ultimates. I have decided not to do a review of Ultimates 3 it was just too awful and poorly done for me to repeat any of it, even the art sucked. Anyways without further adieu here’s the review of The Ultimates 1.

Alright, so we start with Nick Fury, who is now modeled after Samuel L. Jackson, having lunch with Bruce Banner (The Hulk). He talks to him about how he’s been handling the Hulk and asks if there have been any “episodes” lately. Through Bruce’s response we find out that he’s on some kind of drugs that help keep his emotions and the Hulk at bay. Fury then asks how his progress is coming on the new Super-soldier serum (the formula that created Captain America) and Bruce replies that the closest thing they have to any significant results is that of the Hulk(green version). In this Universe the Hulk was created by an experimental serum instead of radiation from an atomic bomb, just wanted to point out the difference. Any who Fury then tells him that the government will fund his research on the condition he keeps the Hulk restrained. He then says that they are putting a team of special scientists and heroes together at a S.H.I.E.L.D. base. He mentions that this team will include Hank Pym (Ant-man/Giant-man), who at this point has the helmet allowing him to talk to ants and control them but cannot shrink down yet. And Jan Pym (Wasp) who can shrink down, shoot stinging laser blasts and has wings. He also mentions that Tony Stark (Iron Man) has allowed The Ultimates to have him and his Iron Man armor in their team. We find out that Betty Ross (Bruce’s usual love interest, and still is here) is in charge of P.R. for The Ultimates and is, pardon my language, a total psycho bitch. She only cares about image, treats Bruce like dirt and has reeeeally weird fetishes (like getting turned on by Bruce when the Hulk eats an alien, WTF!). She asks if they had any luck getting Thor on board. We see a scene in which Bruce and Fury are trying to enlist Thor in some snowy place, I forget where. Anyways Thor is a green peace radical hippie and says he refuses to join the military industrial complex and kill for oil blah blah blah. He then shows off his lightning summoning powers from his hammer Mjollnir and that’s the end of their talk. Hank now settled in conducts an experiment on himself and through it becomes giant…and naked, it happens a lot.



So now Hank has Giant-man powers and is now a hero on the team. Then Fury announces that they’ve found the Captain America frozen in the ice.

They revive Cap and he freaks out, understandably so having been frozen in the 40’s. He lays the smack down on nearly everybody in the hospital room thinking he’s been captured and then jumps out the window. Suddenly Giant-man in an attempt to stop him uses his massive hand to nearly high-five him to death by smashing him! After they’ve calmed him down, he agrees to join the team. Now on to their first mission.

The Ultimates have had no crime to fight and people are getting angry about the government spending billions of dollars on them. This inspires Bruce to mix the Hulk serum with Captain America’s blood and inject it into himself, that and the fact that Betty is on a date with Freddy Prinze Jr. Anyways he Hulks out into the more powerful gray Hulk and goes on a murderous rampage killing hundreds of people. (This is where I begin to give my low marks and bad reviews on this comic) The Ultimates are called into action. They arrive on scene and Hulk is climbing a building to get to Betty saying if Bruce isn’t man enough for her then Hulk is and is basically threatening to rape her. Giant man smashes Hulk into a wall but then gets completely owned by the Hulk who threatens to use his head for a toilet bowl -_- (see image below)


Then Jan appears on scene, by the way Jan is very smart she has a double PhD and not to mention powers and what’s her plan for dealing with the Hulk…



Yeah she just flashed him ugh this is getting harder to write. The Hulk then remarks that he is incredibly horny and that he’s going to get her *someone please help me stop reading this* Cap comes in and wails on Hulk a bit but not well enough. The whole fight is resolved when Thor lets loose with a massive lightning bolt and lays him out. They take Bruce into custody and so on.

They keep the Hulks alter ego of Bruce a secret so that the people won’t demand his death and that no negative light will be cast on the Ultimates (classy). Afterwards we see Hank and Jan preparing for a celebration party. Hank with his inferiority complex plus the fact that he just got owned is feeling touchy and pissed. Jan makes one small comment and Hank flies off the handle and through their arguing we find out Jan is an actual mutant who lays eggs and eats bugs (gross and interesting) and then Hank hits her, hard, bare in mind this happened in the regular universe too, only difference is Hank goes way beyond one smack. Jan hits him back and he starts to really beat her, she shrinks down and then Hank sprays her with bug spray nearly killing her and when she flies off to hide, he has his ants attack her causing her to be hospitalized and near death.

Now we are going to do a quick summary on the things we’ll find out about these characters in this comic. Tony is an even bigger alcoholic than in the regular universe. He has to get wasted just to pilot the suit and womanizes like crazy also the only reason he’s helping is because he has an inoperable brain tumor and figured he’d do something worthwhile before he died.. While mentioning Tony I want to mention Jarvis. In the movies Jarvis is a computer, in the comics he’s a human butler very loyal to Tony, and in the Ultimates he is still a butler but is gay and lusting over almost every member on the team and is nothing but sarcastic to Tony. Bruce is neurotic and beyond whipped and the Hulk…ugh, well you already saw what the Hulk was like. The two mutants Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch have pretty much done nothing up to now and kind of wont, at least in this comic. Jan is really easy; she gets around a lot trying to seduce a lot of people. Cap is great but can be a total a-hole and Thor is an annoying hippie who sleeps with countless groupies, so yeah not exactly the best heroes. I’m going to breeze over the next half of the comic because it’s actually pretty awesome and has some killer action that I can’t do justice with words so I recommend you read it for yourself. It has aliens, a conspiracy involving their influence over WWII and large scale fights. But to sum up we are introduced to Clint Barton aka Hawkeye, who in this is an agent of S.H.I.E.L.D. and a total badass and not to mention the most likeable character. He’s a family man, loves his wife, kicks butt and whips arrows like nobodies business, and Black Widow, also an agent of S.H.I.E.L.D. They attack this corporate building that is actually full of aliens in disguise and it makes for some really epic action. We then have a war involving S.H.I.E.L.D., the Ultimates, and the armies versus the alien armada so yeah check that out.

Now for my overall review, I personally don’t like this comic, I think it’s awful. The characters are uninspiring, trashy, d-bags, violent, and ridiculously promiscuous plus the dialogue is crap. What I will give it though is it has great story ideas, it’s just executed poorly and I love the costume designs and changes…well most of em. Cap’s new suit in the present looks lame and Iron Man looks like a fisher price toy but otherwise many of them look great and more realistic. Where I give this comic the most credit though is the art. Bryan Hitch’s artwork is probably my favorite comic art. It has detail and amazing range and at some points is just downright beautiful. All in all I give it an 2.5/5. Check it out but be ready to have to push through a lot of crap.

Well that’s my review of Ultimates 1, in a day or so I should have Ultimates 2 up which so far has been much better. Thanks again for reading and sharing my pain.

Odd Avenger signing off.

Green Lantern Trailer

I know it's not Avenger related but I have an obligation to important and awesome comics news

Hello again everyone and welcome to another day of Avenger November! Today we will talk about the history of The Ultimates, but first a bit of background on the Ultimate Universe. Now the Ultimate Universe or Ultimate Marvel is a print of comic books published by Marvel and written Mark Millar with art by Bryan Hitch that features updated and modern versions of the superheroes. It launched with Ultimate Spider-man in 2000 followed by Ultimate X-Men and The Ultimates in 2001 and lastly Ultimate Fantastic Four (my personal favorite).

The Ultimate universe takes place in a universe outside of Marvels Earth-616 the characters have reimagined origins which allow new readers to jump right in without needing to know the long histories of the characters, and I must admit often times these origins make more sense and are less convoluted, especially Fantastic Four, but we’ll talk more about that in February. On with the info!

The Ultimates starts with General Nick Fury of S.H.I.E.L.D., who is now styled to look like Samuel L. Jackson(that’s why he plays him in the movies) who puts together a government sanctioned super team to handle the escalating problem of super-villains and otherworldly threats. This team includes an incredibly insecure Bruce Banner a.k.a. The Hulk, an even drunker and more rambunctious Tony Stark a.k.a. Iron Man and the scientist couple with the abusive egotistical Hank Pym a.k.a. Giant-Man/Ant-Man and “slutty” Janet Pym(not Van Dyne) aka Wasp. They all are based at S.H.I.E.L.D. facility called the Triskelion.
Bruce is in charge of developing a new super-soldier serum to create a new Captain America (he hadn’t been found at the time) and Hank and Tony are there to help create gear for the team. Later they are joined by a thawed out and more emotional Captain America, a hippie tree hugging yet insanely powerful Thor, the mutants Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch(still the children of Magneto) and special agents Hawkeye and Black Widow. Together they battle the Hulk, aliens, androids, and other evil supers.

Well, I won’t say much more about it now since that’s what the first of 3 comic reviews will be about but stay tuned and the review of The Ultimates Series 1 should be up by tomorrow!

Thanks again for reading
Odd Avenger out

Avengers Assemble!

Welcome everyone to our first installment of Avengers November, now before I start I just wanted to state why this is the theme this month. #1 it rhymes and #2 With The Avengers movie coming out in 2012 I just wanted to give you guys a bit of background so following in that theme we will be covering almost all the different Avengers groups but the main focus will be The Ultimates because Joss Whedon (the Avengers movie director) is a big fan of the storylines from Ultimates, in fact he writes the foreword to the Ultimates 1 collection, and has said that the movie will be somewhat based off the Ultimates Universe. Also we’ll be covering the original Avengers because of course it will still cover the basics of the Avengers. So with that lets start with the beginning of it all the original Avengers.

Now the very first adventure that brings the Avengers together features the bitter Asgardian trickster god Loki, trying to get revenge on his adopted brother and arch-enemy Thor. Using an illusion, Loki tricks the Hulk into destroying a railroad track, after that he then diverts a radio call by for help by Rick Jones (Hulk’s/Bruce’s close friend who continually tries to help him but we’ll talk about that next month) to Thor, whom Loki hopes will battle the Hulk ending in the Hulk beating Thor to a long blonde haired pulp (my words not his). Unknown to Loki, the radio call is also answered by Ant-Man (Dr. Hank Pym), the Wasp (Janet Van Dyne) and Iron Man (Do you need me to tell you who this is? Really?). After an initial misunderstanding, the heroes unite and defeat Loki. Ant-Man says that the five made a great team and suggests they form a combined team. The Wasp then names the group "the Avengers" because it sounded "dramatic" Not because they are “avenging” something which a lot of people say or they question what they were avenging The original members are known as the "founding members" and are responsible for the name of the team and for carrying out the team's charter. As a result, their wishes regarding the direction of the team are given additional weight.

The roster changes almost immediately by the second issue, Ant-Man is now Giant-Man (instead of shrinking as Ant-man he now grows to epic heights) and, at the end of the issue, the Hulk leaves once he realizes how much the others fear his unstable personality. Feeling that the Hulks leaving were the other member’s fault they go on a search to find him and bring him back. This brings them to the North Atlantic where they discover Steve Rogers'(Captain America’s) body frozen in a block of ice, the Captain's uniform under his soldier's clothes and still carrying his iconic shield. After he comes too, they piece together that Rogers had been preserved in a block of ice since 1945, surviving in such a state only because of the Super-soldier serum in his blood that made him Captain America. The block had begun to melt after the Sub-Mariner/ Prince Namor (another hero, another time), enraged that an Arctic Inuit tribe is worshiping the frozen figure, throws it into the ocean. Rogers accepts membership in the Avengers, and although long out of his time, his vast combat experience makes him a valuable asset to the team. He quickly assumes leadership and has usually returned to that position throughout the team's history.

In later issues Steve Rogers resigns from being Captain America when he refuses to become a government sponsored operative/lackey. He would later return but in his place three new members join the team, all former villains. The first of these is Clint Barton a.k.a. Hawkeye. He was an orphan who ran away and joined the circus, there he was trained in how to use a bow and arrow and sword by two other circus members Swordsman and Trickshot. He later discovered they were both criminals and he rejected them. He saw Iron Man on TV years later and decided to become a costumed hero, but on his first outing a misunderstanding leads to him being accused of theft. On the run he meets then Soviet Union spy the Black Widow who he falls in love with her and she uses it to trick him into helping her steal technology developed by Tony Stark. They fight several times and Hawkeye eventually goes “straight”. He later breaks into Avengers Mansion (located in New York and funded by Tony Stark) and captures their butler Jarvis (yeah the computer system from the movies was a person in the comics) and “applies” for membership and is stunningly accepted.

The other two members are the siblings The Scarlet Witch a.k.a. Wanda Maximoff and Quicksilver a.k.a. Pietro Maximoff. Both are the children of Magneto and after his disappearance feel their debt to Magneto is paid and decide to use their powers for good. So these are the basic members of the Avengers. Later on the team was joined by the Black Panther (think a Batman from Africa) and the synthetic human/android Vision. Now let’s get onto the story.

Now the Avengers have had countless battles and adventures so let’s focus on 4 major events (I’m leaving out the Kree-Skull war because that’s a lot of back-story)
The first major development was the breakdown of Henry Pym/Ant-man/Giant Man. The frequent changes of costume and name were symptomatic of an identity problem and an inferiority complex(especially when you consider at first he was a small man then a big man) this was the underlying cause of a shocking event when he abused his wife Janet Van Dyne/Wasp. After the abuse he lost the trust of the Avengers and failed to win it back with an elaborate ruse and then being duped by the villain Egghead, Pym goes to jail. This is later resolved when Pym outwits Egghead and defeat the latest Masters of Evil single handedly, proving his innocence. Pym reconciles with the Jan, but they decide to remain apart Pym also retires from super heroics but returns some years later.

Another major event is "Ultimate Vision" in which the Vision takes over the world's computer systems in a misguided attempt to create world peace. He is stopped and forgiven by the Avengers but is dismantled by government agents in retaliation. However the Vision and the Scarlet Witch had fallen in love prior to this event, have gotten married and had two children, but we later find out that both of the children are and illusion. This startling revelation and the loss of the Vision drives Wanda insane, although she eventually recovers and rejoins the team it comes back into play in the biggest Avengers event. This story also revealed that the Scarlet Witch's powers include wide-range reality manipulation.

In the last series featuring the original Avengers, "Avengers Disassembled” the story titled "Chaos", featured the deaths of some members and a loss of credibility for the team. The culprit is revealed to be the Scarlet Witch, who has gone insane after agonizing over the memory of her lost children and loses control of her reality-altering powers. With the team in disarray and Avengers Mansion ruined, the surviving members agree to disband.

So there it is folks, our first on a journey. Now the rest of these should be much shorter but we'll see. Next time(probably tomorrow) i will cover the Ultimate universes take on the Avengers known as the Ultimates and after that we'll begin our comic reviews of the Ultimates series. So thanks again for reading and stay tuned all this month for more Avengers!

Avenger November!

Sorry for falling off the map for so long, the new job is a killer,but I'm back and with a special treat! That's right a theme month!!! I know you wanted it, don't try to deny it :D Anywho for the sake of semi-rhyming this month is Avenger November! All month long I'll be posting blogs about the Avengers. All the different Avenger groups,a little history on them and casting ideas. I'll also be doing a comic review of the kinda controversial series The Ultimates, 1,2 and 3. And at the end of the month time willing I'll have a special thanksgiving treat! So stay tuned and thanks for reading!